The madness of PAS

The true madness of PAS (Parental alienation syndrome) is that it is not a sickness of the child, but a malady of the parent.
PAS is not even a recognized disorder. That doesn't mean that parents can't (and don't) do things to annoy and alienate their children, it just means that PAS is being used by some abusive parents as a tactic to derail the beleaguered parent's attempts to protect their children from abuse (much more than the obvious physical abuse--more often emotional, psychological, financial).


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How do you sleep?

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Can you even look me in the eye...
And tell me why?

 (by P!nk)

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Phony Sh*t my Kid's dad says:

Dad: If you don't get on your return flight home, but live here with me instead, you can go visit your Mom any time you want! I'll even pay for it!

(I'll give you two guesses how that turned out.)

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Kid-napping

Have you ever read a news story and wondered how a parent actually got away with kidnapping their child?

Here is the all too simple formula:
Take 1 manipulative parent + 1 impressionable child  =  1 less family member at home now. That is some messed up math.

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Monkey in the Middle

I am thinking that the childhood game of "Monkey in the Middle" probably was not intended to actually be play WITH one's child as the "object" in the middle.

I'm just saying.

parenting

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parental_alienation_syndrome

The party of 'nope':

It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that my  second request to bring my missing child home to at least see us briefly during another school holiday would be denied. Although this young person was promised that (if they gave in to the other parent's relentless coercion and stayed with that parent) they could visit me "anytime they wanted." Once again, the reality of the situation is exposed when tested.
Even though I am, in actuality, on the receiving end of having my child truly "alienated" from me, I still maintain that the situation is not so much a child syndrome, rather a disorder that specific parent possesses.

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(Note: inclusion of this apropos artwork in this post does not necessarily imply endorsement of the content or purpose of the site from which it came.) 

Sh*t my kid's dad says

A little illustration about priorities.

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The plumb line

Swinging in angst against all odds. 

is there anyone up there than can hear me, angels or gods?
Will life ever return to plumb,
or will we all just flounder wondering where we come from?

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Can you buy your children's affection?

Sure you can, but you should not! If a person's affections can be bought, then they just allowed another person to put a dollar value on their worth as a human being.

When parents pay children for the privilege of their love by purchasing expensive and often wasteful gifts, they are aiding and abetting a life time of unwarranted expectations and a sense of entitlement. They spoil them and deny them the opportunity to become decent and giving human beings.
Parents who try to buy their children's affection are setting them up for unrealistic expectations of what to expect from others. The world will not open up its wallet for their children the second he or she becomes unhappy.

There is a lot more on this topic at this website. It is a scary thought that some parents are breeding a whole new generations of narcissists... who will definitely not be equipped to navigate the real world in an effective and non-abusive manner.

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Do you hear what I hear?

No, my friends. It's not Christmas carol time. 

What I hear is the deafening clanging sound of my ex-husband's big brass balls!

Not only did he neglect to return my child after summer visitation and deny my requests to see my child on school breaks thus far, but now I am also expected to continue to pay for my child's out of state medical expenses.

The madness continues. 

Today's mantras as I navigate the madness. 

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